DISNEY VS DR WHO

WHY DISNEY PULLED THE PLUG ON 

DR WHO 

Like it or not. Dr Who's entire popularity is the direct result of the Daleks. 

A fact original producer Verity Lambert took very seriously. And if it wasn't for her insistence on keeping the Daleks in the show, there would be no series.  No Dalek Mania. No Dalek Movies. No legacy at all.

Writer Terry Nation would have faded into obscurity and the BBC would likely have imploded long ago. 

Verity Lambert Original Producer of Dr Who 

Show runner Russell T Davis at least acknowledged this fact and brought the Daleks back during his initial tenure. Gaining 8.64 million viewers. Enough to prick up the ears of Disney. By 2023, they had added the show to their streaming platforms, giving Dr Who a wider, global audience. 

However RTD has miss-placed this success with his own merits, rather than admitting it was really the shows historical monsters.

And heres the dilemma. RTD brought Dr Who back from the dead.

But instead of embracing what aint broke, he tried to appease to the LGBTQ minority and put Dr Who in a dress without any context as to why, other than ticking boxes.

Thus creating an echo-chamber of bland assistants during Whitakers time and throwing Nguti Gatwa into painful musical numbers and expecting him to be taken seriously.

Gatwa left the show exhausted in every sense of the word. Trying to live up to RTD's impossible standards.

That said, there's been some great stories of late: The Devils Chord, Dot and Bubble, The Story & The Engine to name but a few.

But the lack of Daleks of late, just shows how disenfranchised RTD has become with them, despite owing his entire success to their involvement.

Point of fact: he was given a Dalek prop (that builders spent weeks constructing), only for him to let it rot in his back garden. 

What does that tell you?

So its no surprise that Disney pulled the plug.

Russell T Davis: gloating over his miss-placed success

QUATERMASS 2

   

QUATERMASS II

THE ULTIMATE SEQUEL 

When cinema goers got treated to the second outing in the Quatermass movie series in 1957, reviews were at best, mixed. Which is a shame because this film has a shed-load to offer all fans of sci-fi.  I mean, it even has Sid James in it from Carry On. Whats not to like? 

For another thing, Quatermass 2 economises its limited screen time with great efficiency. Right off the bat, we are thrown into the mystery of Winnerden Flats, a rural town wiped from the face of the Earth without explanation. 

Like some Sci-Fi Columbo, Quatermass is on the case, investigating a shady organisation supposedly making food produce, using a recipe so secret, its company goons are willing to kill all trespassers. 

And when it comes to sequel suffixes, this was the first film ever to simply add '2' or 'II' on the title, spurning a long line of movies that followed suit. Notably Friday the 13th Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6...etc 

In terms of mystery and action, Quatermass 2 does not disappoint. A solid plot entrenched in conspiracy and pod-people taking over the Earth.  A testament to its time, it was originally written as a six-part Tv series by one of the BBC's leading script writers Nigel Kneale. 

However, Kneale despised the movie adaptation, particularly actor Brian Donlevy as Professor Quatermass, feeling his delivery was too wooden and John Wayne Yanky Doodle for the part. Still, a ham-fisted Donlevy seemed a fairer bet than his tv counterpart, (John Robinson) who approached the character as a affluent debonair Sherlock Holmes / Noël Coward in space. 

Kneale also part-wrote the script for the movie version and although he was unhappy with the final result, the movie adaptation certainly packed more punch than its Tv counterpart. It also had a better ending. Whereas the TV version had  Quatermass  blundering out into deep space, the movie version kept the plot firmly on the ground. 

Where as Invasion of the Body Snatchers reflected fears of communism, Quatermass 2 stabs at the very heart of the then Conservative Government. Much like today, 1950s Britain was a maze of bureaucracy gone mad, as Government funding is squandered, thrown nilly-willy at pie-in-the-sky endevours, such as taking control of the Suez Canal, against public opinion. 

'Quatermass II was about the evil of secrecy...'  Stated Kneale in an interview with writer John Fleming.  'It was a time when mysterious establishments were popping up: great radar establishments and nuclear establishments like Harwell and Porton Down for germ warfare. All the Quatermass things have been very much tied to their time...'

If anything, Quatermass 2 suffers from being shot in black and white. For a film of this scope, featuring complex battle scenes set against an industrial complex, some of its impact is lost purely because of the lack of colour. Certain scenes are shot in semi-darkness and its difficult to see the entire splender that unfolds due to the quick editing. 

Maybe one day we'll see a colorisation of this film. In the meantime enjoy. 

WHEN ACTORS SLAG

WHEN ACTORS SLAG THEIR OWN MOVIES

It kinda sucks when you go to all that effort to make a movie and your actors slag the shit out of it.

Tippy Hedron's bad experience on The Birds doesn't count. Nor does Ed Harris's near-death experience in James Camerons The Abyss.

I’m talking about divas getting paid huge bucks to sit around all day like lounge lizards and yet they still complain.

Maybe  these types of actors should cut the film-makers a break? 

Take Star Wars for example. Everybody hated it. The camera crew hated it. The editor refused to edit it. The actors thought it was the worst script they’d ever read.

Director George Lucas was really up against it.

‘It almost didn’t get made at all’  He once said. And no wonder. With that sort of encouragement, film-makers require tough skins to deal with such rejection.

Janeane Garofalo played The Bowler in the 1999 cult-classic Mystery Men and slagged the movie off big time.  She said: 

"It was very long hours and very little got accomplished. It was one of those alleged blockbusters that was over budgeted and over hyped. It went from being a great script when it was sent to me, to being - in my opinion - a fairly mediocre non-event. But it was nice to get paid that much to sit around. I have no idea what they were trying to do with the film, but they sure didn't accomplish it."

Although it bombed at the box office, fans united world-wide in their praise of its slick humour, stunning sets and imagination.

It really doesn't take much to bomb a movie. A couple of bad reviews is enough. In the 1960s Dalek Mania took Britain by storm.

So it was only natural to make movies about them.

But only two ever got made before the British Press got their claws in and killed it with a couple of bad reviews. Yet, despite all that, the films became cult classics and even actor Peter Cushing regarded his portrayal of Dr Who as one of his faves.

Tom Hardy was pretty cynical of Mad Max: Fury Road. But I believe he formally apologised after seeing it.

Invariably it’s the end result that counts. Because long after the movie stars of today fade into tomorrow, who cares about who bitched about what.

THE SUBSTANCE

Either love it or hate it.

THE

SUBSTANCE

Keeping the flames of Body Horror alive. 

The subject of Body Horror is a difficult notion for some. Its like a marmite thing. You either love it or hate it. But regardless of its critics, the genre keeps turning out something fresh. 

Enter The Substance: the latest in the long line of Body Horror movies, taking on the marmite mantle and upholding a squeamish tradition prevalent in movie history. So lets recap a little on the genre, and round off with Demi Moore. 

Of course the body horror genre does spill over into slasher movies and so on but lets just focus on the main highlights that made the genre what it is today. 

FRANKENSTEIN 

Aka: The Modern Prometheus (1818) By Mary Shelly. A mad scientist, stitching cadavers together, creating a hideous monster that wreaks revenge upon him for being rejected by society.

But Shelly never got as gruesome as her later movie interpretations and seldom even explained much in the way of details. 

For her it was more about feelings and actions. Societal norms not being adhered to. Kinda like Jane Austin but with a monster in its midst. 

Later interpretations of her monster, although certainly horrific, were seldom the focus of body horror itself. But Shelly got the ball rolling none the less. 

METAMORPHOSIS 

Another notable entry was The Metamorphosis (1915) - a novella by Franz Kafka which regards a travelling salesman who wakes up one morning to find his body has turned into a giant cockroach. 

All this becomes quite a problem for his family, reliant on his income. 

Here we can see the beginnings of body-transmutation in motion, of people reluctantly becoming something else. 

THE QUATERMASS EXPERIMENT 

With the advent of television, The Quatermass Tv series of 1953 is where we really start to see things take an ugly turn.  It could also be argued as the genesis of all Body Horror antics. 

But Shelly and Kafka might have something to say about that. But whatever. 

Of particular note is the movie remake, The Quatermass Experiment (1955). 

Now this is where the genre became prevalent for actual bodily mutation: In which Nigel Neals mutating astronaut, (returning from space) has a penchant for absorbing cactus plants and human flesh.  

We see various scenes of devolution occur, including a memorable scene where the astronauts arm is mutated beyond recognition and covered in cactus spines. 

The grand final, regards said astronaut evading police capture, finally cornered in Westminster Abby, by which time he has mutated into a giant octopus, that threatens the world with its deadly spores. 

INCREDIBLE MELTING MAN 

Following this, came The Incredible Melting Man (1977). So bad it was good. 

Again an astronaut (called Steve) is infected, this time by solar flares and awakens back on Earth, with extreme sunburn and a thirst for blood. 

After chasing a fat nurse down a corridor, (in spectacular slow-mo fashion), Steve goes on a killer rampage, while various parts of his body melt and fall off, like so much melted pepperoni pizza. 

The absolute epitome of Body Horror ensues, as the Incredible Melting Man eats his way through the country side, terrorises the locals and eventually melts into a liquified puddle of puss and bloody goop, that ends up in a factory bin.

BODY SNATCHERS

Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978) is another notable entry into the genre.

A remake of the 1950s film of the same name. But the original  leant heavily on communist concerns, while neglecting how seed-pods become people-pods. 

However the remake goes all out with bodily transformations in great detail, showing how sleep enables the pods to grow pod-people. Theres even a mutated dog with a humans face. 

Amid its memorable cast, includes Star Treks Mr Spock (Leonard Nimoy) as the perfect pod-person. What more could you ask for?     

ALIEN 

Alien (1979)  With its sex-mad face-hugging spiders covered with unsettling human skin and long fingers, while ejaculating eggs into its human host. 

It all leads to that unforgettable and macabre dinner scene and beyond. 

To achieve the ultimate in Alien Body Horror, Director Ridley Scott utilised artist HR Giger's nightmarish bio-mechanical paintings to create his monster, to which Giger won an Oscar. 

By the 1980s the genre really started to ramp it up to full-on Body Horror as we know it today. 

THE THING

The Thing was originally based on the short story: Who Goes There? a 1938 novella by John W. Campbell, under his pen name Don A. Stuart. 

A movie version was made in the 1950s but was more like Frankenstein at the North Pole than the creature of the novella. 

But that all changed with John Carpenters The Thing (1982) taking Body Horror  to a whole new level, honouring the novellas gene-splicing monster that could imitate any creature. 

Bad news for a small group of scientists stranded in Antarctica, when The Thing comes a knockin.

Soon trust is out the window. Paranoia is rife and the only thing left to do is prod blood samples of each member with a hot wire, to work out who is the thing. 

Of course this just makes everything worse. 

Special FX wise, you'll be in for a treat. No CGI here, just plain ole practical effects and artist ingenuity. 

THE FLY 

And lets not forget David Cronenberg's remake of The Fly. (1986), considered a classic Body Horror creep fest. 

In which Scientist Dr Seth Brundle's various experiments in teleportation, soon go awry when his tele-pod inadvertently blends his genes with that of an wondering fly.

The results being bad news for Dr Brundle, as his body gradually mutates and bits fall off him. Such as his ear and his skin and well, everything basically. 

A sort of phoenix from the flesh kinda deal ensues, as the mutated "Brundle Fly" emerges from the good doctors old and diseased body.  

Cronenberg dabbled with these flesh themes several times, including Shivers, Rabid, Scanners and Video Drome - becoming a director synonymous with Body Horror as we know it today. 

HELLRAISER 

No Body Horror list would be complete without mentioning Clive Barkers horror fest Hellraiser (1987). 

With its sadomasochistic Cenobite creatures and cringeworthy re-animated hellbound corpses, Barker makes our skin crawl with every fish hook tugging at our flesh .  

THE BORG 

Body Horror has also dabbled with unifying flesh with metal. An idea built upon HR Gigers bio-mechanics.

This resulted in The Borg featured in Star Trek the Next Generation, which blended machine and man in horrible ways, creating a race of cyborg zombies. 

Echoes of the Cybermen from Dr Who are prevalent but The Borg seem far more insidious and horrifying in their corruption of all things human. 

TETSUO

Following The Borge came the art film Tetsuo: The Iron Man 1989 directed, written, produced, and edited by Shinya Tsukamoto. 

A Japanese art house sci-fi Body Horror fest that touches upon metal fetishes.

SOCIETY 

Take the film Society (1989), another Body Horror film but this time coupled with social commentary, concentrating on Beverly Hills, with its nightmarish flesh orgies held by the social elites.  

It was produced by Brian Yuzna, who made a spate of Body Horror movies including Re-Animator (1985) and From Beyond (1986). 

HUMAN CENTIPEDE 

The Human Centipede  (2009) written and directed by Dutch indy film maker by Tom Six.

To be honest I was kinda hoping for something more like The Fly. 

Instead we got three tourists kidnapped and sewn to each others assholes. 

Why I watched this movie I don't know. It was like watching a car wreck that you couldn't look away from. 

VIDEO NASTIES 

Back in the day, such movies were lambasted  as 'video nasties'. This was the 1980's. A time before Dvds, Blue Rays and Netflix. There wasn't even the internet. All people had was VHS home video tapes, to record and play back their favourite movies off the Tv.

That or rent them  from a local video rental store. Big business at the time. But it also gave way to the term video nasties, when it came to slasher movies and Body Horror. 

Years later these films became cult classics. Which Im sure The Substance will also become.

THE SUBSTANCE 

Which brings us all neatly back to the whole point of this rant. 

Thankyou for listening, and please leave your seats in the upright position. 

Its like American Psycho and The Fly had a love child and set it loose in the flaming Hollywood Hills. 

The Substance takes all the above inspirations and makes something new. Turning old tried and tested tropes on their heads and mashing them into a mangled mush of creative pizza. Which I guess sounds disgusting. But thats the genre folks. 

NOT FOR THE FAINT HEARTED 

BE WARNED ! The Substance its not for the faint-hearted. Body Horror is often an acquired taste and a certain appreciation for special FX is a must!  

But if you like Body Horror, then you'll love The Substance. It utilises all the above examples. 

JEKYLL & HYDE

The Substance is also a great re-imagining on the whole Jekyll and Hyde trope. And takes it in a rather twisted direction. The usual choke on the ole potion and transformation effect is given a literal facelift in every sense of the word.

Echoes of The Thing occur as Demi's back splits open and a young woman falls out. But this also echoes The Body Snatchers as well, with her old body being disregarded. However not quite. For young Demi cant live without old Demi and milks her unconscious body of the elixir it now produces.

The trade off being young Demi must sleep for a week giving old Demi time to recuperate and make more elixir. But soon young Demi wants more hours. Upsetting the whole delicate balance.

NOT ENOUGH DEMIS

My only problem with this movie as a whole, was that Demi Moore should have played both the old and younger versions of herself, as the film kinda contradicted itself by using a young sexy actress, who didn't actually look anything like Demi but its a movie so who cares.

Plus a young Demi Moore could easily be done these days with deep fake & CGI etc. Just look at the latest Indiana Jones movie. Or any deep fake stuff on you tube, such as Tom Cruise prancing round an office.

All in all, Margaret Qualley as great as she is, adds little to the screen other than being young and sexy. But I guess thats what she's supposed to be. The antithesis of Old Demi, being well, just old. 

Had the producers gone the other direction and had two Demis, we might have had the ultimate in Body Horror. Alas. You cant have everything. 

But thats Hollywood folks. 

SOCIAL COMMENTARY

Still, like it or not, this movie is a fantastic commentary on Hollywoods obsession with youth and profit, realised via its insane characters. 

With Hollywood literally up in flames, The Substance can safely prod fun at the movie moguls of old that made many an actors life hell. 

Above all, this is a film about redundancy and anguish. About the young replacing the old. And how that feels. 

Its not an new idea in itself. Plenty of movies touch upon social redundancy, and age prejudices. But few go the whole hog of taking the issue by the horns and wrestling it into a two hour long Body Horror movie. 

In that respect,  The Substance triumphs in relaying that message, while at the same time, making pagodas of us all.  

DENNIS QUAID 

And Dennis Quaid in particular, is quite unsettling and hilarious as the epitome of that Hollywood Dinosaur sleaze mentality and summarises up the Harvey Weinstein's of the old world perfectly.

For example, our first introduction to his character is taking a piss in the john, with his head distorted in the camera lens as he rants on the phone. 

The distortion of his head leaning into the camera, is like viewing him via a spy hole, suggestive of voyeurism, like we the viewer are literally on the other side of that toilet wall, looking in.  

The lens distortion also makes him look parrot-like, accentuating his ugly character to the hilt. Straight off the bat, we are made to feel uncomfortable by his presence.

DEMI MOORE

Demi Moore's performance is also outstanding. Covering a whole range of emotions. From burned out actress in tears, to old hag, raging jealousy over her younger selfs success. 

Yet I cant even remember the last time I saw her in a movie. Must have been GI Jo or Ghost but it was twenty years ago.  

Suddenly she's in this movie. And its like wow! Its Demi Moore! Doing Body Horror!  

But hats off. She really steals the show. And she should get a friken Oscar for it.  Hell Dennis too. 

But alas, at this years Oscar award ceremony, Demi lost out to younger actress Mikey Madison.   

Oh how life imitates art.  And after all that hard work she put in too. 

Still, perhaps it was a little ambitious to get an Oscar for a role in a genre that tends to be side-boarded as video nasty material. 

Never the less, years from now, who's even gonna remember who won the best actress  award of 2025? NOBODY. 

But you can bet your melting ass, that everyone will remember Demi Moores remarkable portrayal in The Substance.